The ENFJ

Temperament: Idealist.

ENFJ

ENFJ s are naturally warm, idealistic, optimistic and sociable individuals. They have a keen sense of the feelings and motivations of people around them, care deeply for humanity and love to help. ENFJ s often develop an extraordinary talent to make sound judgements based on their values and feelings, and although many cannot understand their intuitive skill, people naturally flock to the ENFJ for guidance and meaning in their lives. Because ENFJ s are structured and organized, they can do well in a variety of fields, including the humanities, commerce, management, human resources, politics and diplomacy. The ENFJ is the poster child for our ideal of the prophet, without whom humanitarian values, protection of the weak and devout leadership would vanish from society.

Communication Style

ENFJ s are Extroverts and like to be around people. They are very diplomatic in their language and love to lead people to reach a humanitarian, ethical and ideological goal. ENFJ s have keenly empathic abilities, which means that they are so in tune with the thoughts and feeling of the people around them that it almost seems as if they are part of the ENFJ s own personal thoughts. They are always enthusiastic, charismatic and have a vocal laugh that instills confidence and reassurance in those around them. Because ENFJ s love to help, they have a very likable persona that always seems to inquire about other’s feelings and needs and they often find a way to provide for them. However, the ENFJ s are no pushover and present a charismatic, well-organized and determined face to the world, knowing what they want and making right where wrong has been done.

Learning Style

ENFJ sare dutiful, enjoy discussions and easily understand abstract and theoretical models. Because of this, ENFJ s are good at studying almost anything, but prefer topics that deal with the development of mankind rather than the simple memorization of knowledge. Because they use their Introverted abilities as much as their extroverted ones when they are young, they often turn out as exceptional all-rounders who can listen as much as they talk, are logical as much as they are ethical and study as much as they teach. To make learning easier even for this prodigy of a student, it may help to put topics into perspective of human development and most importantly, to encourage them to voice their opinions and make mistakes even if they don’t feel entirely confident in their knowledge.

What goes on in your head

As part of the Idealist group of types, the ENFJ dreams about making the world a better place and developing the human potential from an early age. However, as they are concerned with the needs of others in the outside world, their internal life is concerned with the development of their personality and how they can become the best they can be. They develop their understanding of the world and the universe, what this means for their own actions and the foundation of their value systems: “what must be right and what must be wrong”. When things are not working out for the ENFJ they can also spend a lot of time pondering over things they don’t understand and especially why some of their actions may not have helped others the way they it was intended.

In Relationships

ENFJ s, like other idealists, are romantic in their search for a partner, whose satisfaction is often more important than their own. They are looking for a deep connection and are loyal to their mates, but may change relationships frequently until they’ve found the right one. In this, the ENFJ doesn’t just look for a playmate or someone to simply enjoy the moment with, but much more for an inspiration to their work and their life. All Intuitives may face the problem that their life calling drives them away from their personal relationships and the ENFJ is no stranger to this. This is why the ENFJ often finds inspiration in the INTP who with their own quest for knowledge can sympathise with the ENFJ s calling and form an effective bond of research, objectivity and ingenuity with the ENFJ s skill in communication, persuasion and leadership.

Growing up

Growing up, ENFJ s are likely to perform well in all areas, being good children, students and friends who above all seem to be interested in being around their friends and participating in group activities. Internally the ENFJ child may feel a little less comfortable than they appear, because their best strength is to make instantaneous decision with their feelings, which takes more time to develop than the strengths of other types. This is especially true because of their Intuitive preference, which means that they generally distrust the common and seek a degree of individuality, which again takes more time to develop successfully. Juggling their internal drives with the ENFJ s need for impact may seem tiring to the ENFJ child, however, it gives them the ability to be exceptionally well rounded, kind and increasingly confident personalities who others naturally seek to follow.

Strengths

 Structured, organized and dependable

 Kind and friendly

 Highly empathic and benevolent

 Enthusiastic and popular

 Natural Leaders, planning and loyal

Weaknesses

 May neglect their personal needs

 May be highly sensitive to criticism

 May lack a sense of objectivity and unrealistically stand to the defence of their loved ones

 May become dependable on outside factors for personal happiness

 May have difficulties to move on in relationships and are susceptible to guilt manipulation

How others should deal with this type

When dealing with an ENFJ , it is important to remember that they approach most things using their Feeling function, which means that they often just “know” what is right. As they are also more interested in how decisions affect people than they are in efficient outcomes, it is important to place your arguments in relation to its human benefits. Secondarily, ENFJ s spend a lot of time assessing themselves and the decisions they make, which means that open criticism can be very hurtful and disabling to them. If you feel that critique is necessary it may be helpful to introduce such with a compliment and rephrase your actual criticism in terms of a suggestion for change. As ENFJ s are keenly interested in the ideas and benefit of others they will be happy to consider your suggestions and include them the next time they make a decision.

How you should deal with others

As an ENFJ you should remember that not everyone has feelings and values as well developed and experienced as yours and that for others to understand your choices and decisions it is sometimes necessary to explain things more objectively. This can be especially problematic when you are dealing with topics that you are not very familiar with. In such circumstances it is oftenmore wise to listen to what others have to say and try to incorporate their input as much as possible to your decisions. Also, as an ENFJ it is important to reflect on your life, the activities you did and decisions you’ve made. ENFJ s can sometimes be too quick to judge a situation or person based on their appearance or the vibe they are getting from them which makes it very important that you assess your intuition as much as you can.